First and foremost, each and every baby is a blessing. Each and every child was perfectly placed within their chosen family by the hand of God himself. A fourth or fifth baby is no less worthy of a welcome than a first, no less important, and no less loved. Just ask anyone who is themselves a fourth, fifth, or tenth child :)
The vast majority of big families aren't in fact ignorant of birth control. Yes , they know what causes it just in case you were thinking of being that one hundredth person to ask lol. Most have made a religious decision to accept God's blessings, are medically or morally opposed to many common birth control methods, or simply have the resources to care for a large family and choose to do so because they love it....or any combo of the above.
Big families aren't the norm and probably wont ever be. Its a totally different lifestyle, and if you haven't chosen it as yours, that's ok too. Different strokes for different folks.
A dear friend of mine once told me that to criticize someones family size is one of the most insulting things anyone can do. I found that statement a little silly. I had three children at the time....little did I know I would one day know all to well how it feels.
I have watched many big families hide a pregnancy to avoid the comments. I have shed tears with mamas over hurt feelings. I have even wasted moments of our busy lives coming up with comments to combat the hurt when all I wanted was to share my joy.
In the end, all I ask is that we all respect each others family size, be that 1 or 15. I believe children are miracles and no child joins any family without Gods approval first :) please don't try and tell him he was wrong. Instead, say congrats, wish them a happy healthy nine months and share a smile for sure!
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate. Psalm 127:3-5
and on that note we announce another blessing joining our family this Sept....P6 is on the way :) we are nervous and excited and sincerely hope you can share in our joy !
Yes, thank you! And as well, even a first or second child - keep your opinions to yourself and say congrats!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that you ever hear negativity regarding your chosen family size...and I hope this time you hear nothing but huge congratulations, well-wishes, and joy regarding the addition of P6. I for one am thrilled. Congratulation - happy and healthy pregnancy and birth vibes to you <3
ReplyDeleteAnd p.s. love the picture!
Congrats! How far apart will the 2 youngest be? Siblings close in age are the best!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Courtney! What a lucky little one to be born into such a big, wonderful, loving family!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad you posted! when are we gonna learn to be happy when a baby comes, no matter which # it is?
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for you Courtney! You will be an awesome mama to 6Ps!
ReplyDeleteWonderful! Congratulations to you and your family! Very good post!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations!!! You are one AMAZING woman and momma! God has blessed you immensely, both with wonderful babies and an incredible abundance of patience. I hope you have a wonderful pregnancy and are blessed with another healthy baby (princess) - and don't shy away from Penelope this time!! Love you!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations again Courtney! This is so well written and I 100% can relate. No one should talk until they walk a day in our shoes. They are missing out on something truly wonderful. Much love to you and your family and Congrats again on P6 on the way! YAY!
ReplyDeleteBeing the father of seven wonderful people...the comments run true on the daddy side of life. Who cares what others say. I always laughed at them inside for they do not know the joy I have. Good luck to you and the Joy "You" know about.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful for you! Ignore the haters. When you are old you will have a crowd of loving people around you, most or all of whom came to know the love of Christ due to your example and your heart that was big enough to contain that many souls. What could be better than that? Children are the only thing in this world that we have any hope of taking with us when we leave it. Talk about "storing up your treasures in heaven"! Congratulations and thank God for this new blessing.
ReplyDeleteI'm sharing your joy with you!!! That is a breathtaking picture. <3
ReplyDeletelove this post, Courtney. Don't listen to haters, they simply don't know what they are missing out on :) You've got some lucky kids there to be in a family like yours!
ReplyDeleteI understand oh too well as a Mom to nearly 7.
ReplyDeleteHuge congratulations on your pregnancy, what a joy to welcome another beautiful baby to your family.
Hey, I just found your blog through Kim Prochazka. I've never seen it until now! Anyway, congratulations on P6, that's very exciting news!
ReplyDeleteI just have one question, and you are always so open and honest I know you will answer it. Hopefully you know me well enough at least from TBW (I'm Mrs Dimples over there, or I was when I was over there!) that you know I mean it with no malice at all. I'm Mormon, you may know, and families with 5 or 6 kids aren't even a blip on the radar screen so you'll get no hating from me!
You mentioned that P6 was not "planned" - but when I hear moms of many say that (well, anyone really, but especially families who already have multiple children) I wonder what it means. If a family is choosing, for any reason, to avoid birth control, then surely a baby must be expected basically any time, so no baby should be a surprise. You must always be "planning" for a baby. Right?
Not that I justify the thinking (or especially the saying out loud!) of "don't you know what causes that?" But I could see how someone with no tact or filter, if you will, could hear a mom with 4, 5, 6 or more children, who is known to welcome children or not use birth control, say "Well, we weren't expecting this one, but we are having another baby!" and think "well, what do you mean you weren't expecting it?!"
I would love to just hear your thoughts on this, if you don't think its much too personal. I asked here and not in an email or something because I thought maybe others would be interested in hearing the answer from an always-honest mom of many.
Again, congratulations, and I can't wait to hear the name you choose! Were you counting on having to find so many "p" names when this all started? :) I vote for Penelope if it's girl, I always loved that one.
well for us we were using the nfp method. no that method isnt fool proof but it is something like 80% effective. we also occasionally combined it with other methods. so for us not planned means we were not trying, we were attempting to avoid, and even though according to my chart i should not be pg, it still worked out that way.
ReplyDeletei think God just decided some people were going to have big families and thats why you see them saying it was unplanned. i get pg on bc so i and have neg side effects inc m/c so i didnt want to take it. i know families who get pg afer the big V as well. i think some fams are just going to be big whether they plan that or not.
so yes, i suppose when you choose nfp you arent expecting a baby per se, but you do know its more of a possibility. and you have to be ok with that.
courtney
Thank you, Courtney. That does make sense. I guess I definitely do think of "NFP as birth control" as "figure on a baby sooner or later!" :) I know I could never do it. Whether or a not a baby is a "good idea", in the heat of the moment I always say I want another one!
ReplyDeleteNot being able to tolerate birth control would, I think, qualify as a message from God for me. I think he knows my disposition and that must be why he allows me to use it with minimal complications!