Learn to Love

Learning to love was a long road for me. I started out life a mean girl. I'm sure many of you can attest. I was the mean girl in high school for sure, but it started long before that. In kindergarden I put a rock from my shoe in another girls ear, by age six i was a pro at giving an indian sunburn, I had dirty looks down to an art form by grade school. Still not sure where it all came from but I was a meanie for certain.

I was blessed with my first child ,Parker, and guess what. It seems he inherited a little bit of my meanie! He peed on a child at preschool, he bit, he threw blocks, he was me with red hair! Beau braved the meanies and we were married. I still had a little bit of meanie in me but as I moved around, made new friends and experienced the world, God worked it out. I think I was 20 by the time I was truly able to be happy for another person. To be joyful for something that didn't benefit myself in some way. Kindness and Love for others sure felt good, much more so than the meanies. I thank the Lord everyday for taking the meanies away :) He has even helped us work out most of Parker's meanies as well, turning him in to a sweet and Godly young man!

Because I lost my meanies I was able to be blessed through friendships that have molded and shaped my life and taught me many lessons. I met Linda who taught me to love alaska and finally got me to enjoy it. Without her Id still have no clue that real maple syrup comes from Vermont and not Mrs. Buttersworth. I met Martha who taught me to look for answers in the Bible, and she also taught me that the worlds largest chocolate fountain resides in alaska and I can take a trip to the choc factory any time I want, It is my right as an American:) Without the meanies, i had alot of extra time on my hands for making friends. I met Carrie who taught me to babywear and cloth diaper. Cathy who showed me how to homeschool. Jen from Texas who taught me to make garlic bread out of hot dog buns, and how to make and love mexican food. Mary who showed me the joy that comes from making special moments with friends amidst the busiest of mommy dayz. There is Theresa who taught me to love and appreciate a good photograph and myself :) and many many more along the way. Just think, if i still had my meanies, all the friendships i would have missed out on. All the love I would have lost.

Looking back, I am thankful for my days as a meanie. There was only one of me, but I have been entrusted to raise, nurture and help develop 5 beautiful personalities. Each one has the potential to become a meanie. To judge others, to ridicule, to become self centered. My first hand experience will help me recognize these behaviors. To squash it before that nasty little seed has a chance to grow. Of course they wont be perfect, they will have their moments, but they will not be meanies. Not if I have anything to say about it :) and fortunately I do!

To all of those who endured my meanies, I say thank you, thanks for not choking me to death and drop kicking me to timbuktu! Im sure I deserved it, and I truly apologize. To those who never met my meanies, consider yourselves oh so lucky! and to those who where around during my transition time, arent u proud of me , look how Ive grown :)